"H" is for Hymie's Merion Station

Got a little sidetracked by vacation, NCAA basketball and work, but the journey resumed this weekend with something a little bit different -- the traditional Jewish delicatessan in Philadelphia's traditional Main Line.

Jewish delis have a weird history -- Italians came over and started serving pasta, the German served sausages, and the Greeks their gyros. All traditional foods from the "home country." But since the wandering nomads of the world (that's us) didn't really have a "home country" they brought with them gigantic smoked meat sandwiches, matzo ball soup, and chopped liver. Why? Who knows. But we did, and good for us. I love a good corned beef on rye with russian dressing and cole slaw. I mean, that's three yummy things together -- how can you miss (that's a rhetorical question, people -- obviously, if any one of those three elements are subpar, you can miss big time)?

Which brings us to the latest stop on our restaurant odyssey -- Hymie's Merion Station. It's as traditional as it gets in the Jewish deli circles. Jewish delis are weird creatures -- it's as much the menu as it is the clientele. I know that the wife sometimes gets a little annoyed when I perpetuate Jewish stereotypes, but the Jewish customer is just classic in their rapid fire demands ("I want a turkey sandwich on rye, but I want the turkey sliced thin and the spicy mustard from New York, with half a side of cole slaw and half a side of potato salad, you can do that right?, and then I want an extra pickle, but don't charge me for it, you can do that right? and extra lemons for my water and two Sweet and Lows, and then a small slice of cheesecake for dessert (wink wink), and oh, are you single, wait let me show you a picture of my granddaughter") Maybe I'm exaggerating (but not much) -- I always snicker inside when I hear one of these orders. And then of course the sweet waitress nods her heads and says, "OK, sure, whatever bubbala."

That's exactly what happened at Hymie's at the table next to us. Just a very long, I-know-what-I-want-and-how-I-want-it kind of order. But I digress...

If you want to take the measure of a Jewish deli, you need to see how their matzo ball soup and corned beef/pastrami/chopped liver tastes. If they can't do that well, they can't survive. And, well, since Hymie's had thrived in the heart of moneyed Main Line for 70 years (there was a 10-minute wait for a table at noon on a Saturday and this isn't a small restaurant), I figured they were going to do these things well. And I was right. Very light, airy Matzo balls, but they didn't fall apart when you cut into them, which is key. And the corned beef/pastrami sandwich with russian dressing and cole slaw I got was very good. The cole slaw initially looked a little drippy, but it tasted the way it should. I will admit I was a little thrown off by the snootiness of the place -- perhaps because there have been so many weird articles in the Inky recently about these ridiculous in-fights going on on the Main Line -- but otherwise, there was a lot to like about Hymie's.

On the full review...

THE FOOD: Much like Murray's in Jenkintown (or thereabouts), there was a combinaton of traditional Jewish favorites for the old timers -- sable and whitefish anyone? -- with more common breakfast items, sandwiches, and more full dinners. The wife was very pleased with her eggs, home fries, bagel, and homemade danish. The home fries were particularly good -- a combination of the crisp, slightly burnt ones along with larger pieces and some fried onions. On any other visit, I probably would have stuck with breakfast as well (it was a bit early on a weekend for a full lunch), but I wanted to give my loyal readers (back down to 3 of you) a comprehensive review. The key to my sandwich was that it wasn't overly stuffed with meat but neither was it scrawny. Very yummy. The matzo ball soup, as mentioned earlier, was also just right. No complaints about the food.

THE DRINKS: I guess it's a good thing when my biggest complaint is about the water, but something was really off there. Especially for a Main Line restaurant, I was expecting drinkable water. It was awful swill. The coffee was good, though. Tables next to us got milkshakes, which looked yummy, but we had already ordered by the time we saw them.

THE STAFF: According to one of the articles on the wall -- Hymie's proudly displayed all the awards its won over the years -- our waitress had been there for 50+ years. I forget her name, but she was nice enough. I loved her hair -- one of those '60s hairdos. I asked the wife if she was going to be asking her hairdresser for that 'do. She kicked me.

MAD PROPS FOR: The clientele. Old, young, middle aged, single, married -- fun for the entire family. Needless to say, it was probably 90% Jewish, and there were some snooty Main Liners (more on that later), but it was entertaining to see the combinations of people walking in and eating together.

OVERALL: A nice change up. It's a very different vibe than, say, Honey's, but I can see why it's so popular. The food is priced right, they move through things quickly, and they pay attention to what their customers want. A well-stocked bakery and deli is attached to the restaurant for take out orders. I did get a little turned off by the snootiness of some customers -- I lined up in the wrong line to pay and the woman behind me sort of turned up her nose and said, "Uh, the register to pay is over there." I keyed her BMW on the way out. Just kidding (or am I?)

THE CHECK: $27, with tip. It was priced right for what we got.

Three months in and we've hit 8 restaurants. We hit a lull for a while, but there have been some recent winners. We're still a bit ahead of schedule and heading into the warmer weather, which means more outdoor seating and checking out the honeys walking by on the sidewalk. I'll bring my camera along to show you the sites.

On to the Is...

Ineligible restaurants for round 9:

• International House of Pancakes: When I was little, I loved the idea of IHOP. Lots of yummy pancakes with lots of yummy syrups. Now? Not so much. I'm a snob.
• Il Cantuccio: My first meal at this Italian stalwart in Northern Liberties was one of the best Italian dinners I've ever had. The second time around was not as stellar, but this is still a reliable (but busy) spot.
• Illuminare: When I first moved into Fairmount, I really used to like Illuminare. The layout is great, with an open kitchen up front, a beautiful courtyard, and really comfortable seating. But the food just isn't where it needs to be for as much as they are charging. It's been a while since I've been back.
• Inn Flight: I think I was here once, but what sticks out for me about Inn Flight is the really low budget commercials they used to constantly have on TV when I was little. For some reason, they stuck.
• Irish Pub: The beer is OK, the atmosphere not so great, and the food is awful. Yet it packs in the college kids.

Candidates for Round 9:

• Ida Mae's Bruncherie: Much as I try to avoid Fishtown, I've read good things about this interesting locale. http://www.idamaesbruncherie.com/.
• Imperial Inn: Dim sum in Chinatown. Somehow, I have never had dim sum in my life. Is it time to try it? http://philadelphia.menupages.com/restaurantdetails?restaurantid=39480.
• Indonesia Restaurant: Weird that there is an Indonesian restaurant near the South Philly stadiums, but why not/ http://www.indonesiarestaurant.com/.
• Inn at St. Peter's Village: Cozy B&B wayyyy out in the boonies. http://www.innatsaintpeters.com/.