Based on this simple final criteria, Memphis Taproom was doomed from the start. Not only was the water warm (not tepid, not lukewarm, I mean, it was warm on a 95-degree evening), not only was there no ice anywhere to be seen in any water glass on any table, not only did our waitress fail to refill our water glasses after our mouths were scalded with a scorched appetizer, but the water tasted disgusting. Fail fail fail.
I had read great things about this hip, upscale pub anchoring the revitalization of Fishtown. The beer selection was good (hard to screw that up) and the menu was, well, different. It was very vegetarian friendly and had some weird sandwiches on it (seitan, anyone?). I wasn't expecting that.
After our grouchy waitress flubbed her description of the menu, the wife and I went first for the deep-fried pickles, one of those "can't miss" offerings I had read good things about. It's weird and it's different, but that's often the best stuff.
Now, I will give our waitress enough credit that she warned us they were incredibly hot and probably shouldn't be eaten without a knife and fork. That was definitely true. Unfortunately, that didn't save my mouth from blistering. Two days later, and I can still feel the remnants of that appetizer. They actually tasted OK for about half a second before my gums started bleeded, but that is hardly consolation. I was panting wanting cold water, but when we finally got our waitress's attention, it was another round of warm Schuykill. Gross.
It didn't get much better. My sandwich, a grilled mushroom grinder with other vegetables and cheese, was 99% bread and 1% substance. Really? It is really that hard to give people their money's worth? I was disgusted. I ate half the sandwich and put the rest aside. "Would you like that wrapped, sir?" "Um, no. I wouldn't feed that to the mouse that rummages through our kitchen from time to time."
Oh well. On to the full review...
THE FOOD: Look, I would understand if the pickles were overdone or the sandwich was sparse or the waitress was a bitch, and then chalk it up to an off night. But I'm sorry, when everything crashes at once, that's the sign of a restaurant I wouldn't ever dare eat at again.
THE DRINK: The beer list was extensive. I guess it'd be OK to drink here.
THE STAFF: "Gee, let's find the most unfriendly, slovenly bitch in the neighborhood and make her the ONLY waitress in the dining area. Yeah, yeah, that'll work."
MAD PROPS FOR: They did have something written on the menu that said something like "If something goes wrong, don't go complaining about it on your blog." I kid you not. Oops.
OVERALL: Hated it. Worse meal of this series. It started pouring rain about 3/4 of the way through our meal. Gee, think that was an omen?
THE CHECK: $42. The tip wasn't exactly generous.
Ineligible restaurants for round 18:
- Radicchio -- Nice, casual, neighborhoody joint. It's a place that is easy to go back to when you live right around the corner (not that I do mind you, but I know someone who does).
- Rae -- There was a lot of buzz about this Daniel Stern creation when it opened in the Cira Centre. The space was gorgeous and the prices matched.
- Raw Sushi & Sake Lounge -- The best sushi in the city. The best men's bathroom in the city. One of the best outdoor lounges in the city. Raw is a definite personal family favorite.
- Rembrandt's -- A Fairmount stalwart, which means I have eaten many meals here. Stick to the Paesano's burger, a healthy beef patty with fries and balsalmic aoili, and you can't go wrong. Veer in other directions and I make no promises.
- Rose Tattoo Cafe -- Such a weird restaurant. It's unbelievably stuck in the '70s and it just so ugly from the exterior. Yuck.
- Roy's -- Chain seafood at its worst.
- Rx -- Cool concept with some good brunch food. Only ate here once, but I liked it.
Candidates for round 18:
- Ralph's -- Perhaps the classic South Philly Italian restaurant. www.ralphsrestaurant.com
- Restaurant School at Walnut Hill College -- As the wife will tell you, I have probably mentioned that I wanted to go to dinner here at least 25 times since we've met, but for whatever reason, plans always fall through. They have a few working restaurants open to the public that are run by students. http://www.walnuthillcollege.com/restaurants2009.asp
- Restaurant M -- Classic French in the Morris House Hotel. Just reopened after a 2-year hiatus. Mainly drinks, but a few snacky type options as well. www.morrishousehotel.com
- Ron's Ribs -- Highly recommended by a man who knows his food as the best BBQ in the city. philadelphia.menupages.com/restaurants/rons-ribs/
Posts
4 comments:
That's really, really too bad about the Memphis Taproom. I've only been there once, but I rather liked it. I did go for brunch though, so I wonder if that made any significant difference. Bummer.
Hey Scott,
Quite a list of negatives, holy cow, where to begin?
Warm water: Totally unacceptable and unbelievably embarrassing. Apologies galore.
Bitchy waitress: We don't really have one of those, so I'm sort of surprised by your comments, but will look into the allegation. Are you an especially sensitive flower about service?
Not ample portion of food: This isn't something that we ever hear from anyone or experience ourselves. Apparently yours was the one bonk performance on this front. I truly do apologize, it's certainly not the norm.
Hot pickles: Not sure what to tell you dude, they're hot when they come out of the kitchen. We warn people.
The rain mid-meal: You can't blame us for the weather, we're not that powerful (but it would be kind of cool if we were).
Hope you'll give us another chance, your experience is highly out of our normal way of conducting business, it'd be nice to be able to right some of these wrongs for you.
Cheers, Leigh@MT
This was my second time at Memphis Taproom for dinner. The first time I thought it was pretty good. The waitress was friendly and I was catching up with a friend so we prob. stayed a little too long..but the waitress was cool about it.
The second time around, I ordered the same thing, the burger. Very good burger..I really liked it. It wasn't your typical burger..it consisted of brisket and a few other meats. I liked how creative it was..and I like brisket.
Anyway, the waitress this time around wasn't so pleasant. I was unimpressed with the pickles but I don't really eat pickles..it was the blogger who wanted them because he heard good things about it. I wasn't impressed. The water was a bit gross and my gin and tonic..not great. PLUS..it was FREEZING in there. I felt like I was in a meat locker..wow. The waitress said she would try to warm it up a bit..I don't know that I felt a change though.
As for the weather..that couldn't be helped.
Overall..the rest of the menu wasn't impressive. If I were ever to go there again, I'd go for the burger..that's it.
Leigh,
First of all, thanks for chiming in -- wasn't expecting that at all. The biggest problem with our waitress wasn't that she was slow -- I saw that she had the whole dining room so I'm willing to give someone leeway for that -- it was that she just seemed plain miserable, as if the restaurant was the last place she wanted to be. It didn't exactly make us want to be there either as a result.
As for the food, not sure what more there is to say. I know many people who have told me they had good meals at MT, I simply didn't. This blog certainly isn't supposed to be a comprehensive restaurant review based upon multiple visits, just my one take based upon one meal on one night. Obviously, some places will perform better than they really are, some will perform worse.
Regardless, it was very nice of you to chime in with your thoughts.
Scott
Post a Comment